I have been reading a couple of books on Grief.  I have realized that at times when things are a blur to me - or I forget things - or the times I wander aimlessly around the house or the grocery in robotic mode - the feeling of being on a 10 second delay - those are all part of the grieving process. Grief is all normal, natural and necessary.  It's normal after being with someone for more than 1/2 of my lifetime.  It's natural in that it's a completly human thing to do.   It's necessary to let the emotions flow when they begin to come to the surface.

I came across the term "Creative Survivor".  Interesting huh??  I know that R would want me to be creative - I can hear him saying - you can do it - just put one foot in front of the other and keep going.  I do feel pretty good about some things I've accomplished and other things that I know he's up there looking down - saying well ... hmmm....  I guess it will work that way.  Some things I'm sure he is proud of me for getting it done!

Creativity isn't really my thing - I'm more of a see it somewhere and do it - than create it on my own.......but I will continue to attempt to be creative and move onward one day at a time because he would of wanted me to do just that and it's going to be O.K.   

"If God brings it to you - God will bring you through it."